Monday, February 18, 2013

Words That Make Me Cringe

I really am not offended easily.  Many times I am offended by the little things people say, the things they do or the way they are doing them, but big things do not offend me as easily.  Weird, I know. 
I use the word inappropriate alot.  :)  And it seems to catch on with Kassidy.  I love hearing her say that something is inappropriate.  I wish I better instilled more things as inappropriate.
We went to the movies the other day for a Valentine's treat and walking out I heard a group of young preteen girls saying:
1) Retarded: I have always felt like this word is just awful when not used with mentally, as in mentally retarded, for literal descriptive purposes.  So many people throw the word around and don't seem to quite understand the power of it.  People use the word to mean stupid or dumb, but yet that is not at all what being mentally retarded (handicapped, disabled, etc) means nor should stupid or dumb ever be used to describe a mentally handicapped person.  The mentally handicapped I have known have always been filled with a different spirit... a special spirit from God.  They may not be "smart" but they are not stupid. 
After we found out that our little Paisley had Trisomy 18, the insult or joke became even more serious for me.  It is as if someone is saying, "You are so stupid.  You are so Paisley."  Thinking about it actually brings tears to my eyes.  How hurtful.  She is our special, dearly loved and extremely missed daughter.  Is that taking it too personally?  Probably and I really just want to inform the user of the word that "retarded" people are special, loved, and wonderfully made people and to use the word any other way is insulting and hurtful.  It is a word that I wish people learned to use properly.   
2) Gay: Ditto for above.  Even if I believe that being gay is a choice and a sin, the sinner is still a person who deserves to treated politely.  It's just another ridiculous, hurtful, ignorant thing to say.
3) Shut Up: I have never liked the phrase shut up.  To me it is an indirect way of saying, "You are not worth my time.  What you have to say is completely pointless and really you are just a waste of my time."  One of my sisters used to say this jokingly (and sometimes not so jokingly) and I would tell her how much I do not want to be told to shut up.  I told her how it offended me and it definitely would not ever be said to my daughter without me throwing a huge fit about it.  She did not understand and thought I was taking it wayyy too personally.  A few months after our last discussion about it she had someone else in our family tell her, very seriously, to shut up.  It was at a time of enjoyment and talking would have been a fun thing, except this person did not want to hear from her at all.  My sister told me afterward that it was the first time she realized how hurtful the phrase is and she could completely understand why I had always taken such offense at it.
4) God's name in vain: Growing up, I was always taught we never say God's name in vain.  Ever.  And besides for maybe a week period of "rebelling" in my preteen years I never have used God's name in vain.  I never quite understood why though until a couple years ago when I heard on the radio the reason: Would you want your name to be used as a curse?  The examples (like the Paisley one above) sound ridiculous, but if you get over that you will get the point. 
                    "Sara dam*it!!"
                    "Oh my Jane!!"
                    "Jesse Christopher!!"
The other examples get worse and worse.  There is anger, frustration, hate and resentment in most of those uses.  Is that when you would like your name to be used?  God is anything but those things.  He is love, patience, kindness and the empitome of self-control.  If anyone deserves to have their name only used for glorifying it is Him. 

What are some words that make you cringe? 

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